Mari

Archive for the ‘Be authentic’ Category

Jaime: If It’s Hysterical, It’s Historical.

In Be authentic, Human behavior, Relationships on 01/09/2014 at 3:43 pm

Jaime, actor, teacher and friend extraordinaire (he’s in Glee! – The Movie), has been a wealth of information over the past several months.

Last weekend, during a moment of crisis, he said something so profound to me over the phone that really struck a chord:

“If it’s hysterical, it’s historical.”

He went onto explain that if we have a reaction to something that is overreactive, makes us jump to conclusions, forces us into making assumptions, or if your walls go up, it’s never in response to what’s going on in that present moment. It is triggering a past experience that made us feel bad, and we bring that experience into the present and create a disaster in the moment.


For example:
– I hate avocados.
– If I were to see avocados in my salad and start yelling at the server for bringing me avocados, it doesn’t have anything to do with the server.
– It has to do with the fact that I was forced to eat avocados as a kid, even when I hated them, and I’m bringing that awful memory to the present, and taking it out on the avocado server.

If it’s hysterical, it’s historical. Thanks, Jaime, for this reasonable way to approach these situations in the future. I needed this drastic shift in paradigm.

Lindsay: Make Things Easy to Find.

In Be authentic, Organization, Parenting, Super Helpful Info on 08/03/2012 at 2:08 pm

I love Lindsay. She started a business called Mamaloot (which subsequently sold in pretty much, like, 6 seconds) and is now VP at Sandbox Industries. When we met (we were on a panel together at Northwestern), I immediately decided that we needed to be friends. Thankfully, we have a passion for entrepreneurship, being moms, being risk takers and getting things done – so it was easy for us to like each other.

We try to schedule lunch every few months. We usually discuss our businesses, the stress of juggling kid(s – plural for her), how we can help each other. It’s always productive, inspiring and super fun.

But the last time we went to Bongo Room, I noticed her fabulous green wallet and super blinged out phone case before we talked about anything. Naturally, I commented on both.

She said, “Oh, thanks! You know how it is – you can never find what you need in your purse. I figured I better make the stuff I need all the time easy to find.”

I looked at my brown wallet and boring phone case and decided that I needed to adopt this mentality. And guess what? A bright orange wallet and bright orange-and-turquoise phone case DO make things easier to find. And more fun, too!

Tony: Don’t Outsource Your Core Competency.

In Be authentic, Business, Experience, Strategy, Tech on 06/21/2012 at 7:53 pm

I met Tony Hsieh at a 37signals event (seems like I meet a lot of people there). He was doing a national tour to promote Delivering Happiness, and my friend Jason invited me to join them. There were only 30 or so people there, so it was a pretty intimate setting, which was great.

Tony talked about his experiences with growing Zappos, and one of the biggest operational hangups he experienced was when they trusted an external company to handle their warehousing and fulfillment. After losing money, losing customers and losing time, Tony writes in his book:

“It was a valuable lesson. We learned that we should never outsource our core competency. As an e-commerce company, we should have considered warehousing to be our core competency from the beginning.”

People think our core competency is cupcakes. But it’s not. There are a million cupcakes in this city. What sets us apart (according to our clients) is the service level that each of them get with each order. Yes, the cupcakes need to be pristine. They need to be impeccable. But what we’re GOOD at, what sets us apart from our competitors, is our personal service.

So taking Tony’s advice, we will never outsource that. You have my word.

Chris: The Thought NEVER Crossed My Mind.

In Be authentic, Human behavior on 09/11/2010 at 11:54 am

Nine years ago today was September 11, 2001.

And a few weeks ago, I had a poignant conversation with my first actual lifelong New Yorker friend, Chris. (By the way, if you’re ever in New York, you MUST check out Chris and his amazing band. They’re enormously talented, great entertainers, authentic, classy and fun. Tell him I sent you. :)) We were talking about September 11: where he was, what he was doing, who he had to run uptown with to get away from the commotion.

As we looked south out the window towards downtown Manhattan, he started reminiscing about how people – people he knew, worked with, was neighbors with – started to leave the city. In droves. They just packed up and moved. To which Chris responded,The thought NEVER crossed my mind. Are you KIDDING me? This is home. There is no way I could even think of leaving this place.”

Said the Manhattanite.

One of the reasons I really love hanging out with Chris is because his passion and authenticity come through in everything he says and does. Case in point.